Life With My Boys: Caption This

Chierika reading Bedtime Story to Ikem

Tonight, I was going through the bedtime routine with Ikem. We had a guest, so he already stayed up late. First was the bedtime story and after that was prayer time, which he led.

Usually, he would say a short prayer, then the Grace, then Surely and we would round up with the greeting ‘Cheer Up brethren, the Word Works!’

Tonight was different, he had started with the short prayer, then he interjected with ‘I just want you to speak in tongues’.
I was a bit surprised but I complied and we started speaking in tongues. I waited for him to round up but he continued, so I followed.

Then my cousin dropped a white saucer of fried plantain besides us (we were in the middle of our sitting room, lying on the floor on a blanket and I had requested for the Plantain earlier).

Yummy

The aroma of the soft, fried over ripe plantain was quite inviting. At this time I tried to round up the prayer by saying ‘Alleluia’ and glancing at Ikem.

For where…

He looked at me and said ‘I just want you to speak in tongues for one last time’.

Chai! 

We continued speaking… Then it dawned on me that he was re-enacting what he saw at the all-night prayer we attended on Friday because he now started making declarations…

‘Father we live by your Word in Jesus name!’ Then he spoke in tongues

‘Your Word will not fail us in Jesus name!’ More tongues.

By this time, I just forgot about the Plantain…

I thought he said one last time, I said in my heart. I tried to round up again by saying ‘Alleluia’.

‘I just want you to pray in tongues for this last time’, he said again, with half open eyes, his palms joined together in prayer position.

Dear Lord… I just burst into laughter… I’m so sorry but it was quite funny.

He groaned, held my shoulders and said, ‘please don’t mess this up’

I quickly repented and we went back to praying in tongues.

When I saw he was speaking slower and probably feeling sleepy, I interjected with ‘In Jesus name.’

He then rounded up with a few more declarations. We shared the Grace, Surely and the Greeting.

Then we reached for the Plantain…

The End.

Life With My Boys: Before Jesus Comes…

Ikem re-enacting the Crucifixion… without the nails!

On Easter Monday, I was attending to a steaming pot of red tomato sauce in the kitchen. Ikem had helped me prepare the bell pepper and had been waiting for the stew to be ready so he can dig in. He came into the kitchen as I was rounding up and the conversation below ensued:

Ikem: Mummy, I’m hungry

Me: The Stew will soon be done

Ikem: When will it be done?

Me: Soon

Ikem: But that’s when Jesus is coming

Me: (Bursts out laughing) The Stew will be done before Jesus comes.
Hallelujah! Jesus is alive and he’s coming back for his people. Are you ready?

John 3:16: For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in him should not perish but have everlasting life.

Romans 10:9-10 (NLT) If you openly declare that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.

http://bible.com/116/rom.10.9.NLT

You can make Jesus Christ the Lord of your life by praying the Prayer below:

“O Lord God,  I believe with all  my heart in Jesus Christ, Son of the living God. I believe He died for me and God raised Him from the dead. I believe  He’s alive today. I confess  with my mouth that Jesus  Christ is  the Lord of my life from this day. Through  Him and in His Name, I have eternal life; I’m born again. Thank you Lord, for saving my soul! I’m now a child of God. Hallelujah!”

Congratulations! You’re now a child of God.

For more information on what to do, please send me an e-mail at thestorytela@gmail.com

Prayer from Rhapsody of Realities Teevo

Life With My Boys: My Baby is Not For Sale

I have a Jiji.ng account, it’s where I sell things I don’t need that are still in very good condition or maybe stuff I got brand new but changed my mind about.

On this particular day, I was nursing Okem and trying to multi-task by uploading stuff on my Jiji.ng page. Usually, he would throw his arms around and when he did it this day, it hit the screen of my tab just when I was about to upload a picture and next thing, I looked at my tab and it was this picture of him that he had selected and it was about to upload.

It really made me laugh, as in how come it was his picture at this time from a random hand throw? I got a screenshot and decided to preserve it for him to see before quickly deleting it mbok! LOL. He is sooo not for sale.

#babynotforsale #notojijing

Life With My Boy: Time No Be Money o! 

Ikem's Old School Costume

Growing up, we heard the famous lyrics of the song: 
Time na money o! Time na money. 

In plain English, Time is money. 

Well, for my four year old, Time is whatever and whenever he wants it to be. 

Anything that took place between yesterday and when he was born is referred to as having happened yesterday. So consider this classic: 

Ikem: Mummy, yesterday, we went to the Jungle and we see Monkeys jumping jumping from one tree to the other…

Me: (Surprised and thinking real hard) Yesterday??? But we were home yesterday. ..

That was when it hit me, we had gone to the ‘Jungle‘ in December (our trip to NCF). LOL. Having understood, it helps me explain to people when he says something like ‘yesterday when I was a baby…’ stuff like that. 

I thought we were just battling with the past until the future came up. Here’s another classic:

Ikem: Mummy when are we going to Shoprite? 

Me: Tomorrow

Ikem: Is this tomorrow? 

Me: (LOLING) No this is today, tomorrow is the day after today. 

Ikem: Aha! Yesterday, we went to Shoprite and I ride a horse and ….

Phew! This was something that happened earlier in the year, I just sat listening and nodding my head.

Well, if you say time is money, try explaining that to a four year old. 

Life With My Boy: The Voice Of God

image

My son dreads cutting his nails, he calls the nail cutter ‘Cutting Wound’ and declares that it’s a dangerous object.

Or maybe I should say that he acts like he dreads cutting his nails when he is at home. This is because when I have to get an Assistant teacher in his school to help (after loosing several fights at home) he would sit properly, stretch out his hands without any tantrums, allow the teacher cut his nails and then say ‘Thank you Miss Alice‘ or ‘Thank you Miss Taiwo‘ depending on who is helping out.

One day, I insisted that he would cut his nails at home while he was awake and we struggled to no avail, so I decided to turn to the jungle for help one last time.

image

I told him he would go to the Jungle and live with animals, since he wants to grow claws in the place of nails. He kept laughing and didn’t budge. I took him out of the house to the staircase and locked the connecting gate. He kept laughing thinking it was a game. I then told him to walk down the staircase and out into the compound/jungle. As he began his descent, I made everyone go inside and then I made a very loud noise ‘moooooooooo’ (I sincerely didn’t expect this to work).

Next thing I heard was Ikem screaming and running up the staircase, ‘Mummy open the door, the Gorrilla is coming’, please open the door’.

I tried so hard to stifle the laughter, the gate had openings so we could see ourselves. I said I would let him in if he was ready to cut his nails. Anyways, it worked and we had a peaceful nail cutting session. Afterwards, I stuck to cutting his nails when he was asleep.

Fast forward to this weekend, we are his room working on his school project, and I noticed his nails were due for a cut.

‘Ikem, you need to cut your nails.’ I said

‘No Mummy, God said I should not cut my nails’. He replied.

Eh’?! I wasn’t sure I heard him well. ‘God cannot tell you not to cut your nails’. I replied.

‘I heard the voice of God, he told me not to cut my nails. Jesus said I should not cut my nails’. He replied smiling back at me.

Heyyyyy!’ I was short of words. ‘God can’t say that, it’s not in the Bible.’ I insisted.

‘The Bible of God says so, Pastor Chris said I should not cut my nails.’

Sincerely, I just left the matter at this point. To be revisited when he falls asleep.

THE END.