When Nigerians Say This…

I laughed hard, really hard when it dawned on me.

My two year old son had just given me a typical Naija response, something you need to know if relating with Nigerians or visiting Nigeria. Or, do I say Africa? Well, I speak for my country.

I had called out to him and in his light slightly high pitched voice, he answered “I’m coming“.

I waited. Nothing.

I’m coming Mummy…

He answered, “I’m coming Mummy” but continued with what he was doing. It was then it hit me.

It’s typical of Nigerians to say ‘I’m coming’ in response to being beckoned but still take a little time to finish up a task at hand or even go in an opposite direction, with the intention to return later.

Or someone could stand up to leave a room and say ‘I’m coming’ while they actually meant ‘I’ll be back’.

I remember on another occasion, he kept walking away, stopping intermittently to say ‘I’m coming Mummy’. Something I’ve done to them on quite some occasions.

I’ve tried to check myself sometimes, and I’ve agreed that I would use the right terms like ‘give me a minute‘ or ‘I’d be back‘ or ‘give me some time‘ but then it seems that ‘greater is the I’m coming in my programming than my efforts at a change’.

I’ll let it pass for the kids as an additional Naija flavour. No need fighting to change what I’m guilty of.

#shrugs

The Storytela

Life With My Boys: A Room for Daughter-in-Law

We are in my room, Ikem and I.

I’m chatting with my Sister on IG about an upcoming family friend’s wedding. We are helping out with some stuff and exchanging ideas and pictures. Ikem sees the picture.

Ikem: Mummy, is Aunty K getting married?

Me: Yes.

Ikem: Who is she getting married to?

Me: You already know

He mentions the name of the person, observes that they are usually together and then wonders why everybody wants him on their train (this will be just the second time). Then…

Ikem: So where will they live?

Me: In Uncle E’s house

Pause. Okem enters. We had left him in the bathroom to continue with water play after his evening bath. We move over to their room. I’m dressing Okem up. The discussion continues.

Ikem: I want my wife to move to my house after we get married.

Me: Yes she will

Ikem: So she can stay here?

Me: No. You will move to your own house, then you get married and she’ll move in.

Ikem: But I want to stay close to Shoprite, Mummy please let her come here.

Me: But Shoprite is in a lot of places. You can always go there.

Ikem: Please will you let me get that Spider Man costume from Shoprite when I become an adult?

Me: You can buy whatever you want with your money as an adult

Ikem: So when I get married, my wife will move here and then I will go and get that Spider Man costume.

I try to put it together and then it dawns on me. I had told him marriage was for adults so he believed that once he became an adult, he would get married and of course buy that costume he saw at Party Perfect.

Ikem: Please Mummy can my wife stay here, I want her to stay here.

I decided to agree. No need explaining further. By the time he becomes an adult, he would have figured it out.

Me: Yes she can.

Ikem: Thank you Mummy. Please don’t forget. Mummy will you forget when I become an adult?

Me: No I won’t.

Lol

The End.